Mike's Little Brother
P. G. Wodehouse
language
(Library of Alexandria, Dec. 27, 2012)
These things happened in New York, which is the capital of the Land of Unexpectedness; which, like Shakespeareās divinity, shapes our ends, rough-hew them how we will. The fool of the family, sent there in despair to add one more to his list of failures, returns home at the end of three years a confirmed victim to elephantitis of the income. His brOther with the bulging forehead and the college education falls, protesting, into the eighteen dollars a week class. Anything may happen in New York. Michael Burke and his brOther Tim had journeyed from Skibbereen to the land where the dollar bills grow on trees, without any definite idea what they were going to do when they arrived there; and New York had handled such promising material in its best manner. Michael it had given to the ranks of the police. Tim it had spirited away. Utterly and absolutely he had vanished. Michael had left Ellis Island while Tim was still there. āAnd divil a sign,ā said he, swinging his club sadly, āhave I seen of me little brOther from that day on.ā We were patrolling Merlin Street, on the East Side, together, one night when he first told me the story. I was the smallest of all possible reporters on The Manhattan Daily Chronicle at the time, and my most important duty was to cover the Windle Market police-station, which is within a stoneās throw of Merlin Street. It was there that I had met Michael; and when matters were quiet at the station, I would accompany him on his beat, and we would talk of many things, but principally of his little brOther Tim. As the days went on, I must have heard the story fifty times. In the telling it sometimes varied, according to Michaelās mood. Sometimes it would be long and unrestrainedly pathetic. At Other times it would have all the brevity of an official report. But it always ended in the same way. āAnd divil a sign,ā Mike would say, āhave I seen of me little brOther from that time on.ā My imagination got to work on the thing. I liked Michael, and the contrast between his words and his granite, expressionless face appealed to me. It was not long before I began to build up in my mindās eye a picture of the vanished Tim. Each night some remark of Mikeās would add anOther touch to the portrait. Why I got the idea that Tim was delicate I do not know. I suppose it came from Mikeās insistence on the epithet ālittle.ā At any rate, Tim to me was a slightly-built boy, curly-haired, blue-eyed and pale. Not unlike little Lord Fauntleroy, grown up. Sometimes he had a cough