Other editions of book The Miserable Mill

I hope, for your sake, that you have not chosen to read this book because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put this book down instantaneously, because of all the books describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are sent to Paltryville to work in a lumber mill, and they find disaster and misfortune lurking behind every log. The pages of this book, I′m sorry to inform you, contain such unpleasantries as a giant pincher machine, a bad casserole, a man with a cloud of smoke where his head should be, a hypnotist, a terrible accident resulting in injury, and coupons. I have promised to write down the entire history of these three poor children, but you haven′t, so if you prefer stories that are more heartwarming, please feel free to make another selection. With all due respect, Lemony Snicket Ages 10+

As the Baudelaire orphans look out the grimy window of the train taking them to the Lucky Smells Lumbermill to live, they can't help but wonder what lies ahead. For Violet, who is an inventor, perhaps there will be machines to observe. Machines that saw wood can be very interesting, even though in the wrong hands they can be the cause of ghastly accidents. And for Klaus, who enjoys reading immensely, perhaps there will be a library. Information found in a book can be very useful. Especially if an evil doctor is lurking about. And for Sunny, who likes nothing better than to bite things with her four sharp teeth, perhaps there will be bark to chew. It is important to keep teeth sharp when someone close by may be hiding a sword. As the train pulls into the station, one thing is certain: The unlucky Baudelaire orphans had best keep their teeth, wits, and minds sharp, for whatever awaits them at the mill may well be the deadliest in a series of unfortunate events.

Dear Listener, I hope, for your sake, that you have not chosen to listen to this recording because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put down this audio instantaneously, because of all the audios describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. This recording, I′m sorry to inform you, contains such unpleasantries as a giant pincher machine, a bad casserole, a man with a cloud of smoke where his head should be, a hypnotist, a terrible accident resulting in injury, and coupons. I have promised to record the entire history of these three poor children, but you haven′t, so if you prefer stories that are more heartwarming, please feel free to make another selection. With all due respect, Lemony Snicket Ages 8+

In their most daring misadventure, the Baudelaire orphans are adopted by very, very rich people, whose penthouse apartment is located mysteriously close to the place where all their misfortune began. Even though their new home in the city is fancy, and the children are clever and charming, I′m sorry to say that still, the unlucky orphans will encounter more disaster and woe. In fact, in this sixth book in A Series of Unfortunate Events, the children will experience a darkened staircase, a red herring, an auction, parsley soda, some friends in a dire situation, a secret passageway, and pinstripe suits. Both literary and irreverent, hilarious and deftly crafted, A Series of Unfortunate Events offers an exquisitely dark comedy in the tradition of Edward Gorey and Roald Dahl. Lemon Snicket′s uproariously unhappy books continue to win readers, despite all his warning. Ages 10+