Books with author Kenny Leek

Dear Readers!In this book are 300 very funny short stories about little Johny. These are Johny's conversations with teachers, parents, adults and friends about the situations of life as well as in school.Johny's innocence and intelligence make you want to laugh at ease.I hope the book will bring you as well as your friends and your relatives the moments of relaxation in life.Thank you for choosing this book!Wish you always cheerful and happy!1At the lesson of natural science, Johny raises his hand:- Teacher, my Dad says that we descended from monkeys. It's true?- Johny, don’t interfere with my lesson! The history of your family does not interest me! 2During the lesson a terrible storm broke out, and to calm the children, the teacher began to explain the origin of lightning.- Well, tell me why lightning never hits the same place?Johny: - Because after the first strike this place no longer exists. 3Mom asks Johny:- How many assignments were on the control today?- 15!- How many did you decide wrongly?- Only one!- Are the others assignments did you decide correctly?- No, I did not have time to decide the others assignments. 4Teacher:- Why your homework, description of the cat, resembles homework of your brother one by one?Johny:- What is there to explain? We have only one cat at home. 5Teacher:- Who are smarter, people or animals?Johny responds:- Of course, animals!- Why?- When I talk to my dog, it understands everything, and when it talks to me, I do not understand anything. 6Teacher:- Now I will prove to you the theorem of Pythagoras.Johny:- No need, we already believe you!7- Look out the window, is our dad coming back from the pub?- He's already coming back!- On which side of the street is he?- On both sides! 8Johny enters the bedroom to his parents and sees that mom sits on dad:- What are you doing here?- I massage fat belly for your Dad.- It will not help. The neighbor girl blows it up every Thursday! 9Johny goes with his Dad past the school:- Son, are you studying at this school?- Yes.- 20 years ago I also studied here.- Now I understood what the director meant when he said that he had not seen such an idiot like me at the school in 20 years. 10A biology teacher asks:- When do you need to pick apples?Peter:- In August!Anna:- In September!Johny with the appearance of an expert:- When the dog is tied!11Johny returns home after his first day at school. His mother jokingly asks:- Well, what did you learn?- There is much already, but this is not enough, because they said that it is necessary to come again tomorrow. 12The teacher asks:- Children. Who among you saved lives for others?Silence in the classroom and only from the last desk a hand is raised.- Well, tell us, Johny.- I saved the life of my nephew.- Very interesting! Tell how?- I changed my sister's birth control pills with vitamins. 13Anna complains to the teacher:- I went to the toilet, and the boys looked into the hole.Johny:- She's lying, she was in her panties. 14Johny comes home and says:- Dad, I stepped on the aunt’s feet on the bus and I apologized, and she gave me a candy for it.- And what did you do?- I stepped on her feet once again. 15The teacher says:- Children, you came to school. You need to sit quietly, and if you want to ask something, raise your hand.Johny is raising a hand.- Is there something you want to ask, Johny?- No, I just check how the system works.