Books with author Al Simmons

It's vacation time for Jessica Davies and her family, but Jessica is anything but happy about it. Forced out of school for a week in early autumn by her inconsiderate parents, Jessica must endure some long and boring days on a houseboat. There, on this floating prison, her very gross and infuriating kid brother severely complicates Jessica's life. Adventure comes by way of a small frog in an old shoebox. Follow out to the mudbank and listen in on the music.

All right, if you’re reading this you are, or have been, frustrated with the process of potty training a stubborn kid. Maybe you’ve secretly and silently cussed the kid out (there’s no profanity in this book) and want the little angel to do his or her darned business.This funny comic was inspired by true events, and most of the feelings illustrated are true. Even some of the facial expressions. The inspiration for the story had #1 taken care of but he wouldn’t not poop on the pot. We thought it would never happen.This comic chronicles that frustration.I Don’t Want to Poop on the Potty! A potty training story for adults, is written and illustrated by Mr. Simmons, author and illustrator of Dan the Exploding Bunny and illustrator of Santa Lost His Silly Ol’ Reindeer, a Christmas book written by his five-year old son. (The inspiration for this book!)

This book is designed to teach children that oh-so-unapproachable topic - procreation. And it does just that in a way that's entertaining, concise, and accurate. 'The Easter Bunny Does Not Lay Eggs' proves that it is NOT too taboo to approach this topic at a young age, but rather it's just the opposite! Children are learning about all sorts of important things at this age, and this is one of them. So pick up a copy and let your kids learn about the magic of the birds and the bees (and the rabbits)!

Every year, Reader’s Digest readers send in tens of thousands of jokes and funny anecdotes, in their quest for a $100 check and, as an extra benefit, eternal glory: to have their joke published in the world’s best-read magazine. One man is stopping them from their quest. Andy Simmons. It takes a sense of humor. And Andy certainly has that. Not only is he the arbiter of all things funny in Reader’s Digest; he is their Mark Twain, Bill Cosby, and even their David Sedaris. In other words, Andy is the guy Reader’s Digest turns to whenever they need a funny story all of America can appreciate. He’s perfect for the job. Andy takes great delight in the funny and oddball side of everyday life. In Now That’s Funny!, Andy presents his most popular, funniest writings on all things America, some exclusive and all-new, some taken from the award-winning pages of Reader’s Digest. You’ll discover the Andy that goes out and tries things. His first-person tales of taking dance lessons, participating in a Revolutionary War reenactment, and even taking stand-up comedy lessons are some of the funniest articles to ever appear in Reader’s Digest. Then you discover the Andy that observes America. His roundups of dumb criminals, crazy lawsuits, ridiculous excuses and out-of-touch scientific research will have you roaring with laughter -- and feeling much better about yourself. Then there’s Andy, the family man. You’ll laugh out loud as he goes in search of his inner macho --or for the next stop on his vacation, if only he can find the directions. And Andy’s observations on marriage and fatherhood are as accurate as they are funny. Finally, there’s Andy the jokester. Here are tales from the job of trying to think, act, and be funny every workday, no matter what the dog did this morning on the rug. Tales of his sit-downs with comic legends from Robin Williams to Woody Allen will have you in stitches. Andy also shares his favorite jokes -- many of them too edgy for printing in Reader’s Digest! Add it up, and it’s a book filled with hundreds of feel-good, laugh-out-loud moments about life in these United States -- exactly the type of reading we need today!