The Second Greatest Story Ever Told
Gorman Bechard
language
(Don't Ask Why, Jan. 1, 2012)
The world has problems! And no one knows that better than God. (He sees everything, remember?) He decides it's time for that ultimate wake-up call. Only this go-round, the Big Man is giving his Daughter a shot. Her name is Ilona. She's 18, lives in the East Village, listens to alternative music, dates, drinks, and has no problem telling the Pope and the President that they better get their act together...pronto! But like every Savior, Ilona has a deadline. She needs to get her message (the 11th commandment: "Be Kind") across now. And what better way than through the media. She becomes a sensation, promoting her word on various talk shows, and from her vantage point on the cover of every magazine. Ilona is the new "It" girl, the messiah for the Millennial Generation: cool, quirky, and sexy. And as Jesus Christ's kid sister, she's not about to take any crap from the men who've been running the show. As with her Brother before her, there are the doubters amongst us. People who feel that God has no right rewriting the Bible and that Ilona is the black sheep of the Holy Family. But God is not about to stand by and watch as his little girl is "crucified." He's had enough of the hypocrisy, and takes out a little revenge on those who refuse to believe...and those who actually try to harm her (the NRA, of course). It all opens the door for Ilona to work her divine magic. THE SECOND GREATEST STORY EVER TOLD is a comic gem of a tale, reminiscent of the work of Nick Hornby, Tom Perrotta, and Kurt Vonnegut, which the New York Times called "an irreverent look at the Second Coming" while the Los Angeles Times said it was "a very very funny book." Hip, enchanting and life affirming, like a female "The Catcher in the Rye," THE SECOND GREATEST STORY EVER TOLD tackles all the big issues: Good, Evil, Rock 'n' Roll, and how it's really time for women to rule the world!